Crush by Gary Paulsen

Author:Gary Paulsen [Paulsen, Gary]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-97453-2
Publisher: Random House Children's Books
Published: 2012-05-08T04:00:00+00:00

The Scientific Mind Studies Truth vs. Theories

’d learned a lot from setting Daniel and his teammates up on Tuesday night. But on Wednesday I was struggling with a fact that every good scientist knows: results only count if you can replicate them. I needed another test subject.

I also needed to take my mind off the fact that I wanted to punch Cash Devine in the gut and then bury him under twenty cubic tons of waste at the Amalgamated Waste Management site.

I’d arrived at the cafeteria in a good mood. Until I’d looked up from my tuna noodle casserole and had seen Cash reach over and fix Tina’s hair. Tina’s hair is flawless, there’s not a single strand that ever needs adjusting; he was just using that as an excuse to touch her.

I turned away from Cash and my mental images of him covered in coffee grounds, snotty tissues and used cat litter, and thought hard about my next romantic experiment.

Goober!

It’d have to be a blind date, though; no way was I going to convince any girl who’d actually met Goober to go out with him. Good, I was adding challenge to the task. That was smart.

Goober is JonPaul’s cousin, a student at the local college. I guess you can call him a student, since he lives on campus and his parents pay tuition; I’m not so sure he qualifies as a student if you think about the scholarly part. He’s … kind of light in the intellect department. And the hygiene department. And the quick-on-the-uptake department.

But he’s a guy and he’s single, and as soon as I was on my way home from school on Wednesday, I called him.

“So, Goob, how’s the love life?” Best to get right to the matter at hand.

“Bummer, man, none of the chicks on this campus appreciate the Goob.”

“Shocking. I might be able to help with that. You busy right now?”

“No, little dude, I’ve got class, uh, science, social studies, psychology—something—but I can blow it off.”

“Okay, come on over, and bring an open mind.”

“On my way.”

I was eager to find out what Goober was looking for in a girl. I’m not sure why I bothered; I didn’t have that many candidates in mind. Or any.

I was waiting for him on the front step when he ambled up the sidewalk.

“Who’s the fox?” he whispered as we passed the kitchen on the way to my room.

“What fox?”

“The chick with the books.”

“That’s my mother.”

“An older woman. Goober likes.”

“No, Goober doesn’t like. What’s wrong with you? She’s my mother, she lives here, she’s not here to meet you, you moron.”

“She available?”

“No! Stop looking at her like that, because you’re creeping me out, not to mention offending her and the sanctity of my entire family structure.” I dragged him to my bedroom and stood between him and the door to protect Mom. I also sent her a silent message: LEAVE THE HOUSE IMMEDIATELY. I made a mental note that our family should do some work on developing our extrasensory perception.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.